Today was my last day at Little Friends daycare. I can't begin to tell you my thoughts or feelings at about 3pm. I'd spent the morning in pre-school and then the afternoon with crying, miserable children. We had 3 babies teething (mind you, we can't give Tylenol unless the parent brings it) one whose mother only brought 3 bottles for the day, and she's too young for anything else, one who has an ear infection and one who got sent home with a fever. I was literally counting down the minutes until the end of the day. I started at 180 minutes.
I'm looking forward to this week for clarity and a fresh start before I begin at Northwestern Mutual.
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Captivated by the Wild at Heart
The past two months I decided to read both "Captivating" and "Wild at Heart". My desire is to grow as a woman of God, but how does that relate to the opposite sex. I know that these ideas in "Wild at Heart" are simply just that, ideas from a simple man of God. But some of them got me thinking...Here are my thoughts while reading "Wild at Heart" by John Eldridge.
1. "Women are viewed as the 'beauty' to be fought for." This is a hard concept for me to grasp. Can we as women do nothing but wait for men to get their act together and fight for us? Are men supposed to be the only pursuers in a relationship?
2. "Men back away from commitment or adventure because they feel they aren't good enough, or that they don't have what it takes." If this is true what can I do as a woman to show my future man (or current men in my life) that he is not a failure or good enough? Everything in this world will constantly challenge a man, how can I be the 'light' in their lives to validate them?
3. Women are attracted to the adventurous side of a man, but as soon as he is hers, she tries to tame him. (Interesting idea...I've seen this happen)
4. "We've come to believe deep in our hearts that needing anyone for anything is a weakness or handicap." (pg 122) How true this is for my life. I've been so independent that I feel ashamed when I need to ask for help or I always believe I will be let down if I trust anyone. I wonder how this will change when I 'NEED' to rely on my significant other.
5. "Satan doesn't just throw thoughts at us, he also can throw feelings." I never really thought that before. I always believed what I felt was from God. Whether it was joy or conviction.
I have learned the past few months that I love to read. I enjoy being constantly challenged by new ideas, but what I've found is that I have a lot to learn.
1. "Women are viewed as the 'beauty' to be fought for." This is a hard concept for me to grasp. Can we as women do nothing but wait for men to get their act together and fight for us? Are men supposed to be the only pursuers in a relationship?
2. "Men back away from commitment or adventure because they feel they aren't good enough, or that they don't have what it takes." If this is true what can I do as a woman to show my future man (or current men in my life) that he is not a failure or good enough? Everything in this world will constantly challenge a man, how can I be the 'light' in their lives to validate them?
3. Women are attracted to the adventurous side of a man, but as soon as he is hers, she tries to tame him. (Interesting idea...I've seen this happen)
4. "We've come to believe deep in our hearts that needing anyone for anything is a weakness or handicap." (pg 122) How true this is for my life. I've been so independent that I feel ashamed when I need to ask for help or I always believe I will be let down if I trust anyone. I wonder how this will change when I 'NEED' to rely on my significant other.
5. "Satan doesn't just throw thoughts at us, he also can throw feelings." I never really thought that before. I always believed what I felt was from God. Whether it was joy or conviction.
I have learned the past few months that I love to read. I enjoy being constantly challenged by new ideas, but what I've found is that I have a lot to learn.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
My God questions...
Ever since I was little I have always thought my uncle Mike was in Heaven with God. I would talk to him, tell him things about me, but obviously didn't get any response..you know typical little girl stuff that I didn't know any better. Lately I've found myself talking to my Grandpa. People always say, "Oh so and so is looking down on us from Heaven." Which got me thinking... Can people who are in Heaven hear our prayers? Or hear when we talk to/about them?
My second God question that has been on my mind this past week is this...how can we seek God when there is an earthly time sensitivity? For instance, this week I have been actively seeking a new car. Not because it's flashy, but because the wheels on my explorer have been grinding so hard when I break that I fear they will fall off. (Especially the front left.) So in searching for an economically friendly (I mostly mean gas), safe car that I can invest in I have found a Mazda3. Figuring it out, it won't cost too much more than my explorer but on the other hand I will save so much on gas. I want to do this in a way that glorifies God. But if I hold off much longer I won't have a vehicle to trade in if you catch my drift. I have been seeking counsel, and working through all the questions they have and I really don't feel like I shouldn't buy this car. I have spent many mind hours and lots of time in prayer and I don't have a bad feeling. Fasting to get answers is another way. Is that all I can do to 'seek God'? How do I know if this is okay with God. He hasn't given me a clear YeS, but he hasn't given me any NO....
Those are my God thoughts this week.
My second God question that has been on my mind this past week is this...how can we seek God when there is an earthly time sensitivity? For instance, this week I have been actively seeking a new car. Not because it's flashy, but because the wheels on my explorer have been grinding so hard when I break that I fear they will fall off. (Especially the front left.) So in searching for an economically friendly (I mostly mean gas), safe car that I can invest in I have found a Mazda3. Figuring it out, it won't cost too much more than my explorer but on the other hand I will save so much on gas. I want to do this in a way that glorifies God. But if I hold off much longer I won't have a vehicle to trade in if you catch my drift. I have been seeking counsel, and working through all the questions they have and I really don't feel like I shouldn't buy this car. I have spent many mind hours and lots of time in prayer and I don't have a bad feeling. Fasting to get answers is another way. Is that all I can do to 'seek God'? How do I know if this is okay with God. He hasn't given me a clear YeS, but he hasn't given me any NO....
Those are my God thoughts this week.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Praise God.
Life has been so busy for me! Typically that would be more of a stress than a praise, but I can't help it, God's been opening so many doors for me that the hectic schedule does nothing to me but wear me out.
First is first. I got offered a Director of Recruitment position at Northwestern Mutual on Monday afternoon. This would be a great opportunity for me to use my skills in networking and the money isn't bad either. I have great feelings about the people I will be working for, my interviews are a minimum of 1 1/2 hours simply because we get sidetracked talking about church and our faith. :) I feel a peace about this position, so today I will be calling and accepting the offer. God hasn't shown me a reason not to. So Friday will be the two week notice to Poopy Friends (Little Friends for those of you who don't know my humor)
Last night was the first night I went to an all women's small group that a few of us are starting. It will be small and simple, we are going to be reading a devotional and I can't tell you how exicited I am. I've been praying about an opportunity like this to come along for a while (seeing as I'm not married or seeing anyone seriously I knew the only small group I was interested in wouldn't work out.)
I've been delivered from so many things in my life but mainly old feelings and old temptations. God has opened my eyes to let me see the truth in situations and I feel very blessed. It's interesting I read that Satan not only produces thoughts, but he can produce feelings as well. Another deliverance would be from the 'party scene'. I had no desire to be there. It was fun being with the people I love this weekend, but as the night grew later I grew more disgusted. Guys coming to hit on me when I was clearly sober...it was just gross. For those of you who ask, I did have one glass of wine this weekend. I prayed about it and justified it and through it all have no conviction. I don't feel the need to explain it through blogging, but if you wonder how, you can ask in person. :)
My car is still working (keeping it always in my prayers to continue), as of February 22 my second credit card will be paid off. That leaves one left! The list goes on and on about how God has been working in my life. I hope this is the uphill climb that never faces down.
PS: This is my 200'th blogpost. Happy 200 to me.
First is first. I got offered a Director of Recruitment position at Northwestern Mutual on Monday afternoon. This would be a great opportunity for me to use my skills in networking and the money isn't bad either. I have great feelings about the people I will be working for, my interviews are a minimum of 1 1/2 hours simply because we get sidetracked talking about church and our faith. :) I feel a peace about this position, so today I will be calling and accepting the offer. God hasn't shown me a reason not to. So Friday will be the two week notice to Poopy Friends (Little Friends for those of you who don't know my humor)
Last night was the first night I went to an all women's small group that a few of us are starting. It will be small and simple, we are going to be reading a devotional and I can't tell you how exicited I am. I've been praying about an opportunity like this to come along for a while (seeing as I'm not married or seeing anyone seriously I knew the only small group I was interested in wouldn't work out.)
I've been delivered from so many things in my life but mainly old feelings and old temptations. God has opened my eyes to let me see the truth in situations and I feel very blessed. It's interesting I read that Satan not only produces thoughts, but he can produce feelings as well. Another deliverance would be from the 'party scene'. I had no desire to be there. It was fun being with the people I love this weekend, but as the night grew later I grew more disgusted. Guys coming to hit on me when I was clearly sober...it was just gross. For those of you who ask, I did have one glass of wine this weekend. I prayed about it and justified it and through it all have no conviction. I don't feel the need to explain it through blogging, but if you wonder how, you can ask in person. :)
My car is still working (keeping it always in my prayers to continue), as of February 22 my second credit card will be paid off. That leaves one left! The list goes on and on about how God has been working in my life. I hope this is the uphill climb that never faces down.
PS: This is my 200'th blogpost. Happy 200 to me.
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
A Booze-free Me
This year I'm participating in Lent. I've never done it before, and for some reason it was easy for me to decide what to sacrifice. Not that drinking is a problem for me, because it's not. I felt that in any social situation there is always the temptation to have a beer, or glass of wine if it's with my lady friends. As of tomorrow I will have the strength to turn down that drink, because I'm giving up alcohol for Lent.
Yes, I was disappointed when I found out Lent starts tomorrow. Simply because my sorority sisters are coming into down for a reunion, and I know there would have been social drinking. I originally thought it was the second week of February. I could skip a drink on Valentine's Day (contrary to how depressed you probably think I would be) :) Just kidding side note: I'm actually extremely happy.
The thought to change my sacrifice quickly ran through my mind only because I know how hard this weekend will be for me. But then I thought about all the temptations Jesus experienced and He could do it. So, starting tomorrow there will be a booze-free Leslie.
Life is good.
Yes, I was disappointed when I found out Lent starts tomorrow. Simply because my sorority sisters are coming into down for a reunion, and I know there would have been social drinking. I originally thought it was the second week of February. I could skip a drink on Valentine's Day (contrary to how depressed you probably think I would be) :) Just kidding side note: I'm actually extremely happy.
The thought to change my sacrifice quickly ran through my mind only because I know how hard this weekend will be for me. But then I thought about all the temptations Jesus experienced and He could do it. So, starting tomorrow there will be a booze-free Leslie.
Life is good.
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