Marriage: Obligation vs Choice

To date I have received 10 wedding related invitations for the year of 2009. It's a very beautiful life stage that I am excited to be a part of. The scary part for me is that every time I celebrate someones new life changes I feel a sense of added responsibility.

This past month I had the great opportunity to fly down to Dallas to witness my childhood best friend marry the man of her dreams. We had always talked about finding the man to marry and starting the families we've always wanted. Our life paths have taken us completely different ways, but when we reunite it's as if nothing has changed. As I was sitting in the airport on my way back I couldn't help but break down.

See, as I was standing as a bridesmaid to witness and vow to the Mann family that I would fight for their marriage, another marriage I vowed to fight for 10 years ago was falling apart back home. I will be the first to say that I do not know the stress that marriage could bring. But for the first time in my entire life I felt conviction and righteous anger.

Marriage is beautiful. As Charlie mentioned on Sunday it's a give and take dance between a husband and wife. A beautiful and humble submission that allows for personal growth each day. Marriage is a choice. When you stand up to make that decision, you make vows to be there forever; not forever until things get tough. Thats where the obligation comes in. The wedding day is when God reigns over the marriage, your friends and family believe you will do whatever it takes to perservere and it's a time to celebrate a new life together.

I can't seem to fathom how you can stand up and make those vows and then years later decide it's just not the life you want anymore.

My prayer over the past few years has been for God to deliver me a spouse. One who loves me unconditionally, challenges me spiritually, and forgives me repeatedly. Maybe it's the heartbreak I've seen that marriages can cause but I am now spending that precious prayer time for those who are hurting.

When I witness Godly marriages, or discuss what a marriage is supposed to be, it brings tears to my eyes. I just wish others could see and feel what I do. I think there would be fewer broken marriages across the world if that were the case.

I know I will continue to wrestle around with this issue but to those who have asked me to, I will continue to fight for your marriage, always know that.